Is it better to keep feelings in?
· Source: Gross & John, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2003
A lot of us keep a straight face and swallow whatever we feel. It feels polite. Psychologists asked people what they usually do with their emotions. Hold them in, or look at the situation again and read it differently. The ones who usually held feelings in felt fewer good emotions, and more bad ones. The ones who looked again felt more good emotions, fewer bad ones, and got on better with people. It's a link, not proof. But hiding a feeling didn't make it smaller. So tonight, say what happened. Then ask yourself one honest question: how else could I see this moment, and what would that change?